“Well, conditions are quite harsh here. Our recommendation is all of our clients to invest all their resources into tinned provisions and hunting rifles.” This nugget of sage advice comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, talking, spectacled member of the slick creature crowd that overruns Manhattan’s high-tech Clamp Tower skyscraper in helmer Joe Dante’s zany follow-up Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Superficially, it’s simply an portfolio pointer from one monster to another. But, in a strange manner, it’s also surprisingly sturdy life advice. Truly, hear me out.
When situations deteriorate, the biggest mistake you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin understands this. Actually, a large portion of the fang-bearing creatures that populate Dante’s unrestrained 1990 movie (debateably his greatest) possess the same sly, self-aware funny bone regarding the hazy boundary separating daily routine and absolute bedlam. It’s a particular aspect of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that keeps me coming back – and as I age, it’s the underlying idea that echoes the loudest.
Understandably, my attachment to this movie did not begin on such an introspective level. Growing up, we were limited to a few scratched-up video tapes at home. Part of that group were Gremlins and its sequel, the latter housed in a chunky ex-rental box likely purchased from an non-chain rental store and sporting growling monsters on its knackered cover. I was instantly captivated and these films quickly proceeded inserting themselves inside my young, susceptible psyche. From then on, they became an near-everyday part of my early years entertainment regimen.
Dante’s initial installment commonly garners all the accolades, thanks mostly because of its reputation as a moderately spooky festive favorite – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins on countless occasions. Nevertheless, its sequel seldom receives the same level of lofty appreciation, which feels unjust. As a kid, I’d always seize the chance to watch Gremlins 2. During sunny school summer breaks, I’d seclude myself indoors and stick it on. When I got my own TV-VHS combo unit, it stayed in constant rotation in my bedroom. With repetition, it ingrained itself in my mental framework. If my parents observed this fixation, they didn’t seem to mind.
As I got older, new insights enriched multiple watches, heightening the enjoyment of watching little green monsters joyously wreck a New York high-rise. I learned the ahead-of-its-time development mogul and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was based squarely upon the eventual commander-in-chief Donald Trump, with his auburn-haired worker Marla (Haviland Morris) alluding to his former spouse Marla Maples. Fortunately, Clamp demonstrates more humanity than his genuine article inspiration.
The “end of civilisation” video Clamp plays during the height of creature carnage? I discovered it was modeled after a real-life “Doomsday” video created by the CNN boss Ted Turner should the world truly faced apocalypse. I noticed how Dante made a special effort to film different iterations of a meta sequence where Gremlins take over the actual feature in progress. A version for theaters, another for home video and television, each delivering a smirking slice of fourth-wall-breaking cultural alchemy before the term was even a thing.
While it was creature designer Rick Baker’s wonderfully grotesque creatures that drew my gaze as a child, this hidden treasure held my interest as an adult. Ultimately, I even interviewed Dante about it myself and he had no reservations informing me he made the movie with the specific aim of poking fun at those who loved its silly-yet-sincere predecessor and desired a sequel. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he cheerfully disclosed. This anarchic insubordination and commitment to not take his sequel as seriously as his Warner Bros bosses evidently expected, only deepened my appreciation further.
When I endured a abrupt familial death not long ago, I was astonished to realize that, during my heightest mourning, all I wanted to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Odd, no? Maybe not. The soothing reminiscence it offered was essential to weaken my mind’s sadness sludge – but the perspectives it had given me as an adult were similarly beneficial.
Like Gremlins tearing apart a genetics laboratory, there’s some things in life you just cannot manage. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to be like them: welcome the pandemonium, commit your entire being into preserved goods and firearms and try not to approach life with excessive gravity.
It’s powerful existential guidance from a highly unexpected fountain – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will always be my comfort movie.